jealousy.

At some and many points in our lives, we are confronted with jealousy- either from someone else or from within ourselves. I stumbled across this article and thought I'd share. From some soul-searching that I've been doing myself lately, I've realized that I am not the most positive person, which perhaps inherently and directly affects my measured levels of success and well-being. Striving to be happy every day- just from life's simple pleasures and moments- is what I tell myself in the back of my mind. This will probably be a major feat for me, but one of my goals is to de-clutter my life by attempting to eliminate negativity that is within my control.


Know How to Deal with Jealousy
http://howtodealwithjealousy.com/

Many of us have often had twinges of jealousy. This can be a normal feeling that we sometimes display. It can become a problem when jealousy begins to consume you. It is important that we begin to understand the factors behind jealousy as well as begin to learn how to deal with jealousy issues. It may be a problem that we have or it might be a problem that we have with other people. It is important to begin to examine some of these issues in order for us to begin to overcome the problems associated with jealousy.

It is important to understand that normally jealousy stems from feeling inadequate or having low self-esteem. If we do not feel good about ourselves, it is certainly very difficult for us to feel good about other people. To overcome jealousy, we need to begin to find ways to feel better about ourselves. We may not feel good about our job, our relationships or our overall feeling of not quite being good enough. When a friend or family member has the things that we do not have, we begin to experience jealousy. This can make us angry and feel resentful for other people’s successes. We may begin to think and feel hateful thoughts toward those that accomplish things that we wish we could.

We need to begin to follow a concept known as fake it until you make it. By doing this, we may begin to be happy for other people’s accomplishments.

When we learn about a friend that has gotten a much better job, instead of displaying negative attitudes, we can congratulate them on their new job. If someone has purchased a new home that we certainly cannot afford, we can make a simple phone call saying how happy we are for them. Once you begin to do this, you may begin to actually feel happy for those that have success. In the meantime, you need to begin working on yourself. You may need to begin to take some action in your life to make necessary changes. This may include taking a look at some of the fears that are preventing you your own success. You may be afraid of looking for a new job or starting a new relationship, and this fear will prevent us from taking action. You can always start with some simple steps. We need to start to behave and act more positively. This can even be each morning telling ourselves we can have the best day ever. It might mean that we start to eat healthier and exercise daily. Instead of being bitter about other people’s accomplishments, we need to take pride in our own accomplishments. Doing some of the simple steps will begin to put the focus back on ourselves rather than looking at other people and everything that they may have.

Once we have begun to make some small changes in our life, we may start to see those feelings of jealousy starting to go way. As we begin to take action and look for that new job or coming up with goals to achieve financial security, we will begin to feel better about ourselves. Most bitter people in the world are not only unhappy, but are unable to achieve a sense of well-being. If we allow ourselves to be overcome by jealousy, we will begin to experience very solitary life. The key to being filled with peace and serenity is to not look at other people but to look at ourselves. There is nothing wrong with trying to improve ourselves and to overcome our shortcomings by learning how to be happy with our life. We then in turn can be happy with other people’s good fortune.

If we are on the other end of jealousy, which means people are perhaps jealous of us, there are some ways that we can learn how to deal with jealous people. You can always tell jealous people by the remarks they make to us if we share information about ourselves. These are the people that will make a sarcastic remark about our life or accomplishments. It is this person that will say derogatory remarks to you when you tell them something good has happened. For example, you just got a new job that pays more money. You tell a friend and their response is “hope you can handle it” or “nothing like that ever happens to me”. This person is jealous because you have something they do not have. Dealing with jealousy from another person is often a difficult thing. Because it is so negative, it is hard not to return the negative feedback and what we need to do is to remain positive and kind. We do not want to stoop to their level. Unfortunately, sometimes these jealous people can affect our relationship. We may begin to not want to talk to them or be around them due to their negative behavior. We can always try to point it out to them. This can either work and the person may begin to change some of their behavior or we may have to decide not to keep them in our life. This is especially true with the person that says nasty or mean things about us due to their jealousy.

We may also see jealousy issues in relationships. We may see this in someone that we are beginning to date, or someone that we have been involved with. This person becomes jealous over relationships that we may have with friends or other people. Again, these issues are due to insecurities of that person. If they do not begin to deal with terror jealousy issues, it can severely impair the success of the relationship. Jealous people will be unable to have trust in you and this can be a huge barrier to the relationship. Some ways to deal with this is of course to talk about it and try to work on this problem together. For those that want to save their relationship, they may want to seek jealousy help through a professional.

Once you identify your jealousy issues or those people that have these feelings, you can begin to make changes with how you deal with these issues. This type of negative feeling will leave us bitter and unhappy. Life is too short to be unhappy and we have the ability to make changes in our lives every day we wake up.